I refuse to turn my entire life into a strategy

A blog about dancing naked, being lazy, keeping some of your gold for yourself, and allowing life to be fucking beautiful.

This morning, I was dancing naked to Gloria and there's something about this song that gets me every single time. Maybe it's the way it holds both desire and heaviness. The way it reminds me that life can feel incredibly heavy at moments, while our hearts are still allowed to desire extraordinary things.

Every time I dance to it, something shifts.

Sometimes it's my own tears that need somewhere to go. Sometimes it's the heaviness of the collective that I can feel moving through me. Sometimes it's simply everything I've been carrying without even realizing how much space it has been taking up.

And then I dance. Naked and free. Without needing to process, understand, or do anything about it. And suddenly there's space again.

This morning, somewhere in the middle of all that naked dancing, a realization landed: I'm was never meant to work so f* much.

Not because I don't love my work. I do.

Not because I work so much, because this realisation has come to me many times throughout the years and I always listen.

And not because I've stopped wanting to create extraordinary wealth, write books, work with extraordinary women, or build something that outlives me.

I haven't.

As I said, I recognize this season. I've been here before. A season where my work isn't to work harder, launch something new, become more visible, or find another way to grow my business.

A season where my work is to give myself permission to let life be easy and to step out of all the bullshit that tells me it shouldn't be.

The constant posting.

The pressure to be visible everywhere.

The idea that because I can help someone, I somehow should. Even when, deep down, I know my gold is meant for something else.

And what I need is space. So much f* space.

Space to draw without needing to turn my art into something.

Space to walk through the forest simply because I love being there.

Space to perform a ritual without secretly asking the universe to bring me another client or financial breakthrough.

A ritual for the sake of the ritual.

Devotion for the sake of devotion.

Space to write for hours, because writing is my lifeline.

Because it's one of the ways I experience myself most deeply.

Because it's who I am.

And a lot of space to be what the world might call lazy.

What if being lazy is your work?

Over the years, I've noticed how many women have come into my world almost searching for a permission slip.

❤️ Permission to slow down and to stop proving themselves.

❤️ Permission to stop turning every waking hour into something useful.

❤️ Permission to be lazy.

Because that's what we've learned to call it, haven't we?

🤐 When you're not producing, you're lazy.

🤐 When you're not actively growing, you're stagnating.

🤐 And when you're not working through another layer of trauma, patterns, blocks, or beliefs, you're somehow avoiding your healing.

But what if you aren't?

What if the woman you're becoming isn't asking you to do more? What if she's asking you to finally allow yourself to be? Especially when your work in this world is about embodiment.

About opening.

About magnetism.

And about helping other women remember what it feels like to be soft, alive, receptive, and deeply connected to themselves.

How can we spend our lives teaching women to open while never allowing ourselves the space to experience that openness?

And there's another pattern I've noticed. One woman becomes addicted to working and another becomes addicted to healing. And there is the one who tells herself to no longer have the dreams she believed she once had…but that is one for another blog. 

Although these two patterns might look completely different from the outside, sometimes they're doing exactly the same thing: keeping themselves busy.

One with the next business strategy and the other with the next wound to uncover. Don't get me wrong, I believe in deep healing. It's part of my life's work…but I also believe there comes a moment when the most profound thing you can do is stop looking for another thing to heal.

And live. Enjoy your life and be in your body.

Make love. Make art. Dance naked.

Allow the beautiful life you've been working so hard to create to actually reach you.

Your life isn't another project that needs to be finished before you're allowed to enjoy it.

Here's where it gets even more interesting.

Because I could turn all of this into another beautiful spiritual lesson about how resting makes us more magnetic. How spaciousness allows abundance to flow and how doing less helps us receive more.

And you know what? I believe there's truth in all of that. I've experienced it. I've lived it. I've watched it happen in my business and in the lives of women I've worked with. But I don't want that to become another reason why I'm allowed to rest.

❤️ I don't want to have to justify my afternoon in the forest by explaining how it helps me become a clearer channel.

❤️ I don't want my naked dancing to become an energetic clearing practice that will somehow make me more abundant.

❤️ I don't want to turn every beautiful ritual into a manifestation technique.

What if I do these things because I fucking love them?

Because they're beautiful and they make me feel alive. Because there's something extraordinary about being a woman with a body, a heart, a soul, and a life to experience.

And what if “just that” is enough?

Not everything sacred needs to become medicine for someone else. Not every piece of wisdom needs to become something I teach. Not every gift needs to be given away.

And last but not least, not every moment of pleasure needs to produce something.

Sometimes I get to be the one receiving my own gold and I get to keep something beautiful just for me.

Having a life so full that you no longer feel the need to turn every beautiful part of it into something useful.

Your gold doesn't always belong to the world.

And this one feels particularly important to me, because I know what it means to have a gift. I know what it means to see things in others that they don't yet see in themselves. I know what it means to recognize where someone is holding back, where there's an opening, and where something extraordinary is waiting to be remembered.

❤️ But just because I can see it doesn't mean it's mine to carry. ❤️ Just because I can help doesn't mean I'm meant to. ❤️ And just because there's wisdom moving through me doesn't mean I have to immediately turn it into something I can share, sell, or give away.

Sometimes my gold is meant for my children or for my marriage.

For the woman I'm becoming.

For the pages of a book nobody has read yet.

For the drawings I make simply because I feel like making them.

And for an afternoon in the forest when absolutely nothing extraordinary seems to happen.

Your gold doesn't always belong to the world. Some of it belongs to you.

And I wonder how many women have forgotten that. Especially the ones who are so incredibly gifted at seeing, holding, guiding, loving, and giving. We've become so good at pouring ourselves into everything and everyone that sometimes we forget we're allowed to receive our own overflow first.

Not because it will make us better at serving others or make us more money.

Just because we're allowed to have a beautiful life and take all the time to enjoy all of it.

What if your soul is leading you somewhere your mind can’t see?

I think this year has brought many intuitive entrepreneurs face to face with some very uncomfortable layers of feeling unsafe. The collective can feel incredibly intense. The world seems to be pulling in a thousand directions at once. And perhaps the business model that once worked beautifully suddenly doesn't feel right anymore.

❤️ Perhaps you're being called into something you cannot yet explain.

❤️ Perhaps the things that used to make sense no longer do.

❤️ And perhaps you can feel that something extraordinary is waiting, but you have absolutely no idea what it looks like. That last one always fascinates me, because we love to talk about trusting our intuition…until our intuition asks us to do something our mind can’t make sense of.

Until there's no clear strategy.

No beautiful business plan.

No promise that the next chapter is going to produce the outcome we're hoping for.

And suddenly trusting ourselves becomes a whole different experience. Because if your mind could already see the way, you could simply follow the plan. Launch this, post more here, or do less there. But what if that's not how the next chapter is meant to be created?

What if you're meant to create magic by putting on the blindfold and listening to our souls?

And what if the very reason that feels unsafe is because your mind can’t see where your soul is leading you?

Not knowing doesn't always mean something is wrong. Sometimes it simply means you're being invited into something you haven't experienced before. Something that asks you to loosen your grip. To trust yourself and to stop trying to control every single outcome.

So the Universe can surprise and delight you.

The work of being the vessel

I've been feeling more and more that part of my work is simply to be the vessel and being the vessel requires something our world doesn't particularly celebrate.

Space. Not the space between fifteen meetings or an hour of self-care squeezed into a fully booked calendar.

REAL SPACE. 

❤️ Space to receive and listen.

❤️ Space to allow my own energy to overflow before I give it away.

❤️ Space to let something beautiful come through me without immediately needing to know what I'm supposed to do with it.

And perhaps that's one of the biggest shifts we can make: to stop treating every beautiful thing in our lives as a resource we should be using.

Our pleasure doesn't always have to become content.

Our rituals don't have to become manifestations.

Our wisdom doesn't have to become another offer.

And our lives definitely don't have to become proof of how spiritually evolved or successful we've become.

Sometimes the most sacred thing you can do is simply enjoy being alive. And I think there's something particularly liberating about realizing that you don't need to make your life smaller to create space for more of yourself.

❤️ You don't need to abandon your ambition.

❤️ You don't need to stop wanting extraordinary things.

❤️ You don't even need to stop working hard when something genuinely lights you up.

Just stop making every single part of your existence serve that ambition. I don't want to build an extraordinary business and accidentally forget to live an extraordinary life.

And yes, life will still break our hearts sometimes

I know, life isn't always beautiful in the ways we wish it would be. Sometimes she disappoints us and everything we thought we knew falls apart. Sometimes our hearts break in ways we never imagined possible. I know that world, too.

After losing our daughter, I know that there are experiences no amount of positive thinking, manifestation, or spiritual devotion can protect us from. And I don't believe we're supposed to pretend otherwise.

But I also experienced that when life breaks our hearts, love can still find us. Softness can still find us. Miracles can still happen. Grief and pleasure can exist in the same body. Your broken heart can still open to love.

It’s all part of the miracle. Not that life becomes predictable or nothing painful will ever happen again. It’s your invitation to stop waiting for life to become perfectly safe before you allow yourselves to receive her beauty.

The most revolutionary thing you can do, especially in times like these, is to stop trying to control every single outcome. To create some space and allow yourself to be a little lazy.

❤️ To listen and receive.

❤️ To expect miracles without demanding to know exactly how they're going to arrive.

❤️ And to trust that our gold isn't disappearing simply because we're not constantly giving it away.

Because maybe you’re not here to exhaust yourself creating a life that looks extraordinary from the outside. You’re here to actually experience how extraordinary life can be.

Being the vessel is part of the work, but being alive is the point.

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